The husband had very graciously said:
“You know, it’s fine with me. She can come live with us. I know she’s your mom and I’m sure you have very strong feelings for her and feel very close to her. So, it’s fine if she comes to live with us.”
Surprisingly the wife said, “Absolutely not. She’ll never live with me.”
When the husband asked why, the wife said:
“Because the entire time that I spent living at home, my mother would constantly belittle and berate my father in front of me. I developed such resentment towards her, and I can’t let it go. My mother argued in front of me all the time. She did this almost every day. I couldn’t wait to move out. When I went to college, I finally got out of there and never looked, or went, back.”
When you are angry, you feel you have the right and need to express that anger. You can get so caught up in it that you don’t even realize that the children are there. And there are consequences.
Here is an example of the consequences. Because the wife could never forget her mother arguing in front of her, she never wanted to have anything to do with her mother again. She would find her mother housing, but someplace other than her own home.
Parents, do not argue in front of your children.
The consequences are far greater than you imagine.
Did your parents argue in front of you when you were a child? How did it affect your relationship with your parents?
Don Sinkov Your Divorce Mediator Westchester County, NY Putnam County, NY Phone: (914) 588-6258 eMail: Info@YourDivorceMediator.com